Naked Fantasies Beginning

 All my life has been a set up for weight gain. In 2006 I enlisted in the Army at a weight of 150 lbs and 30 percent body fat. During my time in ( which wasn't long) I had a couple heat strokes. The aftermath had made me undeployable so I ended up getting a discharge for medical reasons. Shortly after my discharge my fiance was deployed. ( And by short time I mean a week or two ) So there I was alone and unable to drive. I was a very paranoid person coming out of the Army. So as a result I barely left the house. I did everything I could think of not to. And as a result I got up to weighing 180 lbs by the time my fiance got home. We got married a month later after he got home. And then we found out we were pregnant another month later. During this time my relationship with my mother was not there. Even though we always argued once I started college and working ( I started young at 15 1/2 yrs old ) we still talked. It was way better when we didn't live together. 
    While pregnant my mom passed away. It was devastating. There I was 7 months and 2 weeks pregnant and my mom of 38 yrs passed away. So the last bit of my pregnancy I ate and shopped. By the time I had my little girl I weighed in at 234lbs before and after her birth 200.
    After having my daughter we ended up PCSing to Australia. Where I live is in the middle of nowhere. So the things that people do here are drink and eat. I mean Australia is known for its love of the alcohol. So I gained weight. I got up to around 215 lbs and then got pregnant with my second and last child. During this pregnancy I got really sick. For a couple of days all I did was get sick. It got bad to where I was in the emergency room and was given medication. After getting sick I really didn't eat much. I ate subway, took my vitamins, and stayed in the house. I had trouble getting around because he was so big. At 5 months pregnant he was so big that it was getting to the point where I would almost pass out and need to hang over to get my heart rate under control. When I had my son I weighed in at 215 lbs. After having him I had complications. I got sick again and had to have multiple surgeries after having him. I lost a lot of blood. I had to spend 10 days not eating. Which was easy with all the medication I was on. By the time I was able to eat I weighed in at 170 lbs. With blood lose and not eating that was my lowest weight in awhile. But as soon as I started eating I got right back up to 210. I started working out in July of 2011 and have so far lost 5 lbs. I am limited in what exercise I can do because I need to have more surgeries.
 I have a want to be able to look at myself naked and be pleased. So I will start a pretty drastic diet in hopes that it would put me on the road I wish to travel. The last time I weighed myself which was 4 days ago I weighed 205lbs. The highest weight I have ever reached was 234lbs. I am setting my goal at 145lbs. If I can get lower I will be super happy about it. 

So here I go. Ready for whatever may come my way.